The Four Reasons Why Your New Year’s Resolutions Fail
It’s that time of the year again, 1st January rolls around and the New Year’s Resolutioners are as motivated as ever to achieve their goals. The gyms are full, book sales increase, people buy yearly planners and a renewed shared sense of hope is experienced. But how many times have you made this resolution before? If it is a brand new one then great, but for many people the same resolution appears to be on repeat year after year which begs the question … what makes this year any different?
Well you’re so much more motivated this year right? Your will power will not be diminished this year? The circumstances are so much better this year? You know what to do this time around … right? Or maybe nothing is different about this year, maybe there’s something wrong with the resolution you’ve set for yourself.
Amount: You want to lose 20kg, you want to get straight A’s in every subject and you want to learn how to speak fluent Spanish. While these goals sound great in theory we often set goals that are just a little too ambitious for reality and when we do not achieve them in their entirety we perceive ourselves as a failure.
Speed: Who doesn’t want to achieve their goals quickly, it’s definitely a lot more desirable than waiting years. Unfortunately, however, the expectation of quick deliveries is often unattainable resulting in giving up rather than simply practicing patience.
Ease: While we usually understand that our goals are challenging we often underestimate just how much we may struggle to achieve them. By underestimating the ease at which these goals are likely to be attained we often feel discouraged and defeated.
Effects on other aspects of life: We often believe that achieving our goals will have a profound impact on other aspects of our life. For example, losing weight will make us more attractive and likeable. Or making more money will make us happier, give us more opportunities and more confident. So if we fail it is not just the goal we have failed at … it’s other aspects of our lives too. Or conversely if we manage to achieve our goals, even partially, and these other life changes do not occur we may feel disappointed and unwilling to maintain these achievements. 
Okay great, so we’re basically doomed to achieve our goals then? Not necessarily! It may be useful to instead reframe the way in which we plan our goals.
Use implementation intentions: Implementation intensions are essentially the when, where and how of your goals. E.g. I will begin training for my triathlon on the 5th January, I will train at the athletics track and I will run 5 kilometres. By planning for when you will start setting out to achieve your goal, where this action will take place and how you will go about applying this action you are more likely to be successful in achieving it.
Reframing failure: You’re not a failure if you slip up or get derailed from your goal. Almost everyone will at some stage. It is important that you reframe the way you view these set-backs. One suggestion is to look at your goal in the long term. For example, only viewing the goal as ‘not achieved’ if your monthly target has not been met rather than defining your successes or failures over one instance. Another suggestion is to view these set-backs as learning curves, assessing why it occurred and addressing this in the future.
Plan for slip ups: No matter whether you are successful or not in achieving your goal there are bound to be slip ups along the way. By creating an action plan for these slip ups you are more likely to bounce back from them rather than accept defeat. E.g. if I do poorly on an assignment I will speak to my teacher, identify where I went wrong and work on my weak points in the future.
Use SMART goals:Specific – Establishing the what, where, when, how often, with whom etc. of your goal.Measurable - Identifying exactly what achieving your goal looks like.Attainable - Ensuring your goal is realistic taking into account a range of internal and external factors.Relevant – Identifying what achieving this goal will mean to you and why it is important.Timely – Setting time frames and breaking your goal into smaller parts in which to meet these time frames.
On a final note, it is important to recognise that you do not need a new year to set goals for yourself. If you really want to achieve something then don’t cripple yourself by waiting for a specific moment … start now!